Over time some friends become the family that you choose. What is it that leads us to create bonds of friendship with someone? What is it that makes us want to share and trust? Human beings need to belong, love and be loved.
In my group of friends, like in many others I imagine, everyone is a mixture of their father and mother. Our origins are different, our careers are different, we look very different… and nevertheless we are moved by the same things. That is the magic of friendship.
Not long ago, on a sunny Saturday afternoon in the Empordà, my friend Jan made us listen to the lyrics of a wonderful song. They are concise, simple and discerning phrases, with a touch of humour which made us smile and say “of course, that’s what we have to do”. Just then our friend Anna remembered an inspiring phrase by David Carradine that she had shared on her social media and that fitted perfectly with the conversation triggered by the song lyrics. It was the cherry on top: “If you can’t be the poet, be the poem”.
The three of us were overcome by a heart-warming feeling of friendship that made us remember how much we need to enjoy our friends even though family, motherhood in my case, and work pushes it into third, fourth or fifth place.
It was so special to rediscover it together since we all miss more moments of friendship when we can share thoughts, feelings and be moved by the same interests. It makes us feel alive.
The three of us are in the middle of parenthood which pushes us to question our attitudes, beliefs and patterns of behaviour, to constantly question ourselves as individuals and to unlearn in order to grow as individuals to be better mothers and fathers, which is our biggest responsibility. It is interesting to see how as we get older we are less afraid to talk about our doubts and weaknesses because we are increasingly more aware of what it is that we need.
Since I can’t share the smell of nature that surrounded us that afternoon, or the taste of the tea we were drinking and the feeling of enthusiasm that moved us, I’m leaving you with the song ‘Note to Self’ by Oren Lavie so that you can at least enjoy the tune and the fantastic common sense expressed in the lyrics.
See you soon,
V
This content appeared first on my newsletter ‘A woman, many women’ on April 2019 issue. Click here to subscribe to my newsletter.